MY LIFE HAPPENINGS (issues of a dancer/cheerleader/eating disordered LESBIAN girl)

synopsis of the week.. hehe.. and its the weekend!!

2007-10-12T11:30:00.000-04:00

hey guys thanks for all those nice comments. you guys are crazy!! but in a good way.. love it!

anyway i havent updated since monday so yea...

TUESDAY

didn't go to work. it was raining alot like thunderstorm and all. so I couldn't go to work. i love the rain.. for more than 1 reason ;-).. but i don't like being on the road when its happening. thats all.. so i stayed home and watch some documentry..."gays in the 70's". it was mostly about gay men really.. and wow lol it was as if they just discovered sex exsisted in the 70's cuz they were having it alot and every where like in the back of big trucks on the empty docks , in burned out or unfinished bulidings. but i benefited from that documentry.. made me understand things more for gay men anyway.

WEDNESDAY

went to work.. felt horny as hell...rain and lots of it does that to me.. yea.. did loads a work.. blah blah moving on

yesterday (thursday)..best day of the this week!

oh my god it started out as a really lame day but got all good at the end of the day. i had to work late right.. cuz 1 in my country monday coming is a holiday and i will not be working late on friday so i worked late yesterday rite since i had lots a work to do and 2 the rain was pouring really bad so that means traffic.. so yea that just cemented my decision to stay at work. my friend who works on the oppsite street from me said she was working late too and we could home together so i wasn't that freaked out to work late. well normally im not freaked cuz when im working late there are ppl in the building on my floor or the other floor. but yesterday i was the only one in all 7 floors of the building.. i know! lol. well me and the 2 securities who are on the 1st floor anyway.. o wow..

yea so she says she would just finish up what she was doing and come over when shes dun.. if i wasnt ready. well ppl are not allowed in my section as it has high importance confidential informtion. but since every one was gone and the security didnt know that, i told her she could just tell them shes coming to me and keep my company.. if my boos was there i would be so dead!.. haha anyway..

i had loads of work doing i was so tired but you know when you are working and talking to ur friend it doesn't seem that bad... so our convo kinda went like this lol..this was at 6pm

' i bumped into shana-kay' i said with a kind of a cringed face

'really o my god that stalker girl lol'

yea she seems cool tho but she was very touchy-feelie..lol'

'i bet shes been hunting u since forever'

'i know '.. i said with a i dont give a rats ass.. kinda look...

aftere that we just both burst out laughing.. it was so crazy that girl seriously scares me.. never been freaked out by any girls b4 but this one...damn.. lol its not even me being a pussy or ntn but shes a psycho!...

yea so im like trying to finishing up my work and get the hell out of here and get me a drink or something.. red wine preferably.. love red wine.. i feel this hand on my leg under the desk.. i almost had a heart attack! lol.. she just laughed and said.. did i scare u? in the most seductive voice that i love...i was like no well u startled me...yea she was you were so concentrated on your work you look stressed and tense.. so jokingly.. jokingly im serious just jokingly i said ok so come rub my shoulder for a while..so i dont feel so tense..honestly, peeps i wasnt even thinking sex -wise.. well i was thinking hehe but not for it to happen with her at all. i mean we cool like that you know. plus she knows me and she said she cant deal with me sexually .. she says ' im too much for her' so yea.. nothing gona happen at all.. bummer! lol so she actually rubbed my shoulders.. ain't that sweet!.. after that i went back to work..i felt her hands under the desk again but this time i wasn't startled lol.. yea without looking up from my computer i said nope not this time lol...

but i didnt expect that she herself was under the desk!!! now theres a shocker!.. yup she was on her knees with her face on my leg.. i was in a skirt that day.. cuz i was supppose to go to another social meeting and didnt wanna wear pants.. so had on knee highs and straps to keep them up attached to my undies u know, i always have to wear it that way.. so yea she was like some how shes glad im in a skirt.. so i was like ok what are you doing, whats wrong with you? no i had to ask because the girl is my friend and love her to death,. but she signed off on me sexually a good while back which is cool cuz we still friends rite.. yea

so she parts my leg and puts her hand under my skirt...can you say shocked! not shocked at what she was doing.. but shocked because its her you know..and she said... this is whats wrong with me.. touching my my cunt thru my undies.. can i get it? she said like some cute little school girl.. man that just drove me over the edge., in my head i was like o my god.. is this a good odea.. i dont think so.. but yea.. then i was like fuck it! im game hahaha. lol ..

ok this is gonna get detailed and might be long.. so if you wanna u can read on...

shes like i wanna do you on this table... in that chair.... on this wall... every where..wtf! i was like ok ma.. bring it!.. well i dont mind being handled if you know what i mean. i find it hot.. so she backs me up on the wall i mean lol im like whoa...i mean both hands pressed to mine against the wall and her legs between my legs keeping them parted...i wanna take you over she says whispering in my ears.. yep there going my undies.. they were officially soaked now..im getting all hot just typing about it.. oh god...so with my legs still parted she turns around and rubs her pefectly shaped apple bottom on me.. i almost melted to the floor.. how the hell did she know that i like that so much.. so far shes hitting the nail on the head.. with everything shes doing..damn!..so naturally i hold on to her ass while she doing that.. she turns around and slaps my hands and my face..what! no..ok seriously wat the hell.. what the heck did i do..what did she expect me to do...let me tell u i fucking love that! hahaha just turned me on more..i was like ok all putting up my hands like i surrender then she continue to rub up on me.. i cant handle anymore.. sheesh.. then she bend over and undo her straps on her shoes and i dont know how but when turn around her skirt was gone and her top was open and her bra.. what bra! lol.. i felt like i was being taken over...hotest feeling ever..she mouthed the words " im gona rock your universe".. holy fuck im in for a ride...o gosh i dont even think i can finish typing this without cuming in this chair!...she proceeds to unbutton my blouse and undo the zip on the side of my skirt...matching lace undies and bra.. i like.. she said almost surprised... she massge my breast so tenderly and kissed my neck(which is like 1 of my weak spots! u see what i mean about doing evrything rite!) she was doing all this while removing the rest of my clothing..she then look in my eyes... i thought she was looking in my soul.. she was looking so deep you know.. then she gave me the slowest sexiest kiss that i have had in a long while...i was like whoa.. i think i need to sit.. she laughed. almost wickedly.. but then i sat on my chair she strandled me and started kissing me intensely she was all over me.. i was all over her.. it just got really raunchy really fast.. it was almost as if i was holding back and so was she.. she ripped my blouse off and i.. well i had nothing remove since she removed all her clothing.. and she wasnt wear any undies...lol .. yes!..

she kissed my face, my lips, my neck..ooo...my chest then she moved to my nipples.. man shes good..im trying to hold out as long as possible but it wasnt that easy..i was so drenched..she puts her hand between my legs and started rubbing my clit..in big circles and slow and then small cirlces and fast ..fuckkk!! i came..lol yea man it was intense.. she didnt stop she just continued man this was intense..i was on a high..lol ..i want u to kneel in the chair with ur face to the back of the chair. so yea my ass was facing her.. she was like bend over on that chair for me baby...lol wow i was like almost gona die wit antiscipation of what to expect.. she slapped my ass.....i so love that.. its one of my things.. loving doing it and getting it dun to me.. argghh fuck...

she sucked, lick, tongue fuck and did everything with her tongue that any one person could possibly do with cunt.. on the table, on the chair, ..all over th place in my office. it was incredible i lost track after my 5th time cuming and orgasming.. man after, i was so weak...then she look at me and said something that made me forget how weak i was.. i got all reved up again.. she said "i did all that to you first because i know that if i had let you go first i couldn't do anything else after.. i know how u roll..hehe i was all smiles.. after she pleased me so expertly i was gona go all out on her and please her to the max! hey and i did.. she screamed at one point i had to cover her mouth(the security!) but of course i didnt stop so it was a muffled scream.. hot!..yea i had her sitting on my face at one point and when she was having her orgasm man was that intense... she was vibrating on face like a phone all the desk was shaking..lol wow! and through all that i found a few things that she like wen i do it alot.. so every now and then i would do it and kinda drive her over.. i love wen she moan.. it get me so hot! like i'll only mention one thing. with my tongue i can fold my tongue into anyshape(of course these shapes have no name like circle or square) yea but im in total control of it.. yea i fold my tongue on the tip of her clit (like blanket) and twist my tongue on the reversed side while.. moving the tip of my tonue only.. and pulling it at the same time (yea i can move the very tip of my tongue without the top part moving at all when it is stucked complete ly out of my mouth).. dont know how to explain it but i hope yall get it...she says it feels like her clit is get a mssage and licked from all different angle even reversed...haha..it was awesome..

we left the office at 8.30pm.. she said shes gona call me so we can chat about something.. dunno

yea i know that was my steamy office encounter yesterday..lol i went home and nothing couldnt upset me at all i was just mellow:-D....

friday(today)

well im at work(the scene of the crime!) lol yea im at work just trying finish up some stuff. yea do u guys remember in the post b4 this one.. i mention that chick that text me. well im going on the town tonight and she said she would come meet me.. so yea im gona go see who she is..~~dun.. dun.. duaaahhh!!~~~ haha.. yea ill let ayll know how it went.. im out

its not about how many women i get to sleep with or who is attratced to me.. but its the fact that i make them happy and i please them, that keeps me happy. i dont know how to explain it but i just genuinely love to please women in what ever way i can. from just a nice talk to making love. they should honoured.. special beings that were created.

do onto other as you would like them to do onto u.

P.S. I CURRENTLY WRITING A BOOK AND I THINK IT WILL CATHCH A WIDE RANGE OF AUDIENCES

(its about me being a lesbian and i write about childhood until now and how i have grown and changed over the years and how society has played a role in my life, how ppl i have encountered has affect me negs and pos, , also a bout being the way i am from a caribbean point of view, and the underground issue of gays in my country and sexual encounters.. so a whole barragge of things. i have gotten good feedback with my excerpt that i let ppl read)

**sexy kisess for all**

rain on me

2007-10-08T12:45:00.000-04:00

hey all thanks for the comments!!! love u all hehe..

hot steamy kisses for everyone!!

well anyway heres a summary of wednesday to now. lol well i know ya'll want juicey details so

**WARNING MASSIVE RAMBLING ABOUT TO START**

P.S. get ur popcorn...lol

Wednesday

that day was just weird. i mean seriously. ok heres the deal rite. so lugging along my usual day at work.. can't wait for it to end as usually. feeling a bit pressured and stressed. work plus exam on the wekkend not a pretty picture. so i finally reach home and was going through some information. i get this call from my friend julie..

shes all like hey'danzer'(not using my real name ofcourse) there's a buzz about u. hehe yea julie always has the 411.. u know those people but she isn't inquisitive but ppl just always happen to be telling her stuff without her asking. so yea i was like what's the buzz.. she like ppl(girls) are asking if u are single.. so im like wtf! why are ppl talking about me, she goes on... you i havent been on the lesbian scene for a while.. by lesbian scene i mean parties and house orgies and so forth. yea so im in this weird relationship rite now like a long distance thing./ but no matter what ii do or who i do;) ill be marrying this girl u know. yes i love her! but we have an understanding since she is away and all.. yea enufF of that back to the story...

so im like julie u know my situation.. shes all like yea well ppl wanna know why ur not back on the scene.. and she was like in low voice..'some really hot chicas are interested in you ma' so i was like ok ill bare that in mind in an equaly low voice.lol then she goes off on me!! haha about she tries picking up girls and all they do is ask who ur friend(that wud be me) and then im like hey hey hey thats not my fault.. shes like she know but i always come off like i dont give a fuck.. cuz i dont give the girl the time of day( time a day means talking to them with fucking them in the future in mind) look im not that type of person. they are women.. respect is due.. they are not just sex objects so i dont treat them as such. i might fool around but im not an asshole.

the next weird thing was that i got text on my fone in the night and it went like this:

''HEY I HEARD U WERE INTERESTED IN GIRLS AND I'D REALLY LIKE TO KNOW U SO IF U WANNA KNOW WHO THIS IS CALL ME OR TEXT ME BACK''

haha i know rite.. so i didnt text back.. because one i didnt have the least idea who it could be and suppose it was some malicious person trying to find out some info on me...

then i got another text saying:

"OK WELL U DONT HAVE TO CALL U CAN TEXT ME. I HEARD ABOUT U FROM A FRIEND THAT KNOWS UAND I THINK UR REALLY INTERESTING"

so i decided to text back BECAUSE WHICH FRIEND WAS THAT? FROM WHERE? WHEN? U KNOW...but i kept it very general so basically i asked ok i dont know who u are but which friend is that. and she was all like she cant tell me yet or the friend that told her about me desnt want me to now yet. i mean all in all she seems like a very interesting girl... but yea still dont know her. so now we kinda just text each other and call sometimes. but shes alway sending me text like every morning and evrynight b4 i go to bed and when i wake up..the text are always on this line:

HEY BEAUTIFUL,GOODMORNING/GOODNIGHT I HOPE U HAVE WONDERFUL DAY OR A PEACEFUL NIGHT BABE. (depening on when she sends the text u know)

so yea she seems really cool i haven't met her yet, dont know what she looks like. look i dont do blind dates and that whole fone meeting thing.. yea not my style i dont do that so this is all odd to me.. but ill let yall know how that goes.

Thursday

this day was normal so to speak just studied and text my admirer lol. nothing to report

Friday

more studying.. i masturbated to release some stress.. i could call up any one to come over but didnt because then that would take whole night ..(sorry im nymph) so i just decided to just have some self satisfaction and then go back to last minute review of my s.a.t questions.

Saturday

s.a.t exam. i was under exam conditions from 9am-2pm.. like holy mother of pearl!! seriously that was long. then saynia came and picked me up shes such a sweet heart. we had lunch ok a late lunch.. hehe then we had dessert..(yup we made out in the car!) and shes a loud moaner and tad bit of a screamer.. i dunno but i totally love that when women moan.. its so beautiful and gets me so hot!!

shes all like.." i love have sex with u all the time cuz wen we are doing it, its like nothing else in the world matters to u and ur worshipping my body" well i wouldnt put it like that. but women bodys are like temples and should be honoured at all times.

Sunday

this was my relaxation day.. s.ats are over! yup over can u say totally happy!!

i was so happy i had a 3some lol.... hehe yea my best friend from high school came over to borrow this book for math that i had.. and it started to rain so she couldnt leave yet.. h my god i love raining days.. well when i dont have to dgo anywhere... and u know since.. ahrmm i was there.. and she was here... yea we decided to watch t.v..lol..... then after a while the t.v was watching us! lol

porn 101... take 1... action!! lol yea.. then one of mates from dance came over and im really open with her.. shes cool like that.. would do anything for her if i can.. love ya renae!! so when she came in a saw us.. she just went crazy and jump rite in... we had a bath together all of us.. like i lather them both up and just wash while caressing every detail of their bodies.. yea then got lathered up.. but it was double the fun since they both were doing it hehe lol yup..(oh joy) then after i gave them both a masage.. and then it got really steamy at one point we were all licking and sucking at each other pussy ,.. lets see if i can explain it. we were in a circle like and eating each other from behind.. kinda look like the recycling sign.. u know the 3 arrows going around.. lol

like this except some one else would be infron of that girl.

today monday october 9

blah i hate mondays! well it was pouring like crazy this mroning so i could get out to go to work.. happy! but then i remembered i have to go to work a report is dued today.. darn!! arhhh and whats worst the girl that livs near to me she didnt even come to work.. so if i didnt come then it wouldnt look anyway cuz thenthey wud assume its the rain why we both didnt come.. darn!! and i bet no rain falls tomorrow. if rain falls tomorrow i ont be coming.. and just my luck(sarcastic) it won fall.. never works for me..bah humbug!

anyway im fucking horny.. i need you!!

tingling sensations!

2007-10-02T14:03:00.000-04:00

hey guys im back!!! with load a news lol

well friday was a blast!!! yay i went to a bar and got drinks and just had some serious fun!!! it was great ... i was with keisha sanny and jody.

heres a little background.. keisha was orginally lusting after me but at that point i didnt want a girlfriend and she kept pushing it so i would just fool around with her.... no no not sex but we were really sexual with each other... follow... ok good! yea keisha and saNNy are friends and keisha intro sanny to me and sanny likes me a lot like , like me like me but we are just good friends that and i'm also sexual withher... but with boundries... and jody and i are friend and i introduce jody to keisha and now they are dating seriously!! yep got all that... good!

well yea we all were at the bar and it was all fun, dancing and drinking and having a good time... had to leave a bit early cuz i have to get up early next morning for studying and dancing... i know how to have fun but i got my PRIORITIES straight....lol all in all it was fun!

yea on saturday i studied alot im so happy but still not satisfied... and then i went dancing.. it was great as usual.. but dang i need to strengthen my core... seriously! my ab muscles suck... well not totally but its not where i want it to be u know... i mean a lean mid-section is good but for me it has to be strong too ;-). then i went to chill by sanny for a while... come on naughty i called her.. lol yea cuz even tho i was on my period.. chica was still trying to get in my shorts...i know rite!! i had to like do some serious resisting in watever way i could... but after a while i left b4 i got raped.. lol nah for real man mami was pressuring me..

sunday went to church..**angel smile**.. yea i always go to church.. on sunday i would rarely miss it... then studied alot and got my self ready for stinky moday morning

well monday was singlely the most stressing day of my work life ever! i had a really bad day yesterday damn!!.. even when sanny call me i could hardly talk to her i was totally out of it... but omg!!!! omfg!!! guess who i saw STACY... yep my ex-g/f stacy.. yea she was with her b/f .. we hugged cuz im always happy to see stacy .. she was all like omg u look so great.. in my head im like shes acting like this is the first time she saw me in years she saw me last month.. lol yea .. a little background on stacy..( yea she absolutely amazing!! nothing wrong with her at all shes hot shes funny sweet talented .. and everything... wondering why we broke up??? well back then we were 2 much of divas to be together her life was fast, busy and hectic.. my life was faster, hectic and busy... we just had no time for it to work... so yea.. we just saw each other whenevr we could... can i tell u amazing sex!!... lol after all this ill tell u one sexual encounter;-) yea in the end i decided i always want her in my life.. and she said ofcourse too.. but she said she could never be with any other girl.. so she swore of our kind and went with a guy instaed.. yea i know sad.. but we both moved on...)
well after that long day ended i went home and sanny call me to see if i was alrite..(how sweet) yea and then i went jogging with her.. atleast something good came out of that day.. excercise.. yes!! still wanna loose 5-10lbs for this yr...

STACY AND I(short version)

well we decided to go out after work yea stacy and i worked together.. ..background(but at that time i was with this girl called lushane.. the one i mention in the post below yea we werent exclusive but u know our friends knew we were sorta together sex wise and other wise.. but not official... yea but then some shit went down because lushane ex-g/f came work at the same office... can u believe that motha fucker!! i know .... how convienient.. now im the type of person that hates drama..lol so yea ofcourse g/f and ex-g/f and lushane in one workplace.. yea shit went down.. even a fight at a club.. not with me.. cuz that would have not been a fight that would have been a beat down!! cuz i would tear her ass up!! but yea lushane and her ex fought after that i just bailed and told her i couldn't work with this constant issue. so we became 'friends' that was like in january... like around novemeber me and stacy hooked up...)

yea so we went to the club me and stacy took over the dance floor.. i was in the skin fited leggings thing that stopped at my knee and a top that stop just below my breast and it was an off the shoulder blouse..(u picture that) yea stacy was in booty shorts and a nice fitted top that was backless.. sexy! yea we and the girls .. were all dancing and it was like a dance orgy thing in the middle of the club.. i swear we were the only ones out there.. cuz every time i looked people stopped dancing and just watched... i didnt care.. yea every one was dancing with every one... parts of bodies rubbed,,, it was hot.. stacy and i was all upon each other and grinding on each other.. i bend over while stacy practically grind on my ass... and squeezed my tities than i wrapped 1 leg around her and and wine on her alot and just having a great time.. after awhile i swear i was gona burst ..out all in cum on the dance floor so we left and like in the parking lot of the club we started making out rite on the bonnet of the car... lol yea we are kissing and my hands were down her shorts and her hands under my blouse and we were kissing intensely.. then we had to stop cuz the security was all like wow.. do u guys need a room.. lol so we got in the car and drove to stacy house.. thats the fastest i have ever reached anywhere in my life!! lol yea we made it up to the roof.. you got it the roof!! hell yea

we had champagne and and i poured it all over and i mean everywhere and licked her clean.. i wanted to make her cum so much times and really good and hard so i went all out on her.. and omg she screamed really loud we had to hide when persons came out to look cuz they could see our heads if we stood up.. after it quiet down.. she sucked my nipples and licked every where and until i came and man did i cum.. alot but when she was finish u wouldnt know hehe...

man that was one of the history making sexcapades of my life!!!

well this week its serious business.. i have advised everyone not to call me i will call them and im cut off from the world.. cuz im

STUDYING!! yep s.a.ts this saturday..so last minute cracking down.. so by friday im done and ready!!

wish me luck!

well off i go now

**SMOOCHES**

week end!!!

2007-09-28T10:34:00.000-04:00

i'm so happy its the bloody weekend people!!!...

haha i don't know why i'm so excited anyway come to think of it... this weekend involve studying and redecorating house... not that i mind that but what i do mind is that my weekend will involve no form of or has no possiblity of sex!!! damn !!

yea sucks for me and you know why... this damn thing called the period!! man i hate it.. seriously if i had the money i'd get these darn things removed... or maybe just find someway to stop my period.. honestly.. well the upside is i get no cramps or any bull like that so ..mm its ok i guess.. anyway enough about stinky periods:-( stayed home yesterday from work... yay for me! well on the first day of my period i don't like to go to work.. i'm such a bitch on that day! lol so i studied alot.. so proud hehe

well like lastnight sanny calls me up rite..(sanny is my friend...and shes coo)l we hook up sometimes(i.e.sex) yea we were talking lastnight bout lots a stuff and she like oh my moms going to the country for the weekend and i could come over and have all the crazy 'fun' (by fun u know.. hehe) i want... in my head i dive off a cliff head first!! but out of my mouth came i can't hun my period's here.. i think she blew herself up in her head the way she was acting...lol she was more upset than me over my period... she was like " oh man thats not fair... yadda yadda...i really wanna get naughty with you...." and the rest i'll keep to myself for my personal amusement... kidding i just feel a little embarassed by what she was saying.. things like you get me so hot and your like the best sex i have ever had and i'm really good in bed and know exactly what a woman wants and how she wants and so on... i don't know i just feel funny when ppl go on like that.... am i weird??

anyway all in all i'm gona be chillin with her at the house.. cuz she says she wants and like my company... so i will cuz she's good company too...
today i don'y have any plans but i'll just going with the moment..! let y'all know how it went

i'm gona study from 7am saturday till around 1pm then swing by her(sanny) and stay till 5pm then leave and go to play pool with mark and couple other chicks that i think are super!(chrissy, stacey,diane, lushane and sarah.. 2 of these girls were the ones i had the 3some with the other day) then by 9pm im back at candice and then by 12 midnight or there about i'll be home.

yay!

......... ramblings

2007-09-26T13:52:00.000-04:00

is it just me or society tend to determine what is accepted or not accepted. what is to be or not to be, what is right and what isn't.. ok are we drones in the society that are program to do what the majority does.. lol just a thought
so i was chilling with myfriends at our regular pool place.. which is my friends chrissy house lol
yea so we are there and otherppl are there too.. so cris this guy who's reallly cool was playing pool so wanted a game... i won! well duh crisis what we call a 'face boy'. as in he only looks good but does nothing good.
i was on the couch at one point and my friend mark and i were talking and he asked me (he's str8 by the way) 'what is it about women that turns u on so?'... in my head i'm like what the fuck is this... i mean is hould ask him the same question lol.. but hey i felt like humoring him.... so upon telling him my thoughts on the question.... i gained a friend....she says she not a lesbian or bi.. she says shes str8 lol but yet she wants me to dance with her and kiss herand touch her in ways that might be deamed 'lesbian like'. but hey i was just having funa dn so was she.. its ok wit me!
WHAT IS IT ABOUT WOMEN???

well what ever it is i love it!! and they are to treasured..

making progress

2007-09-24T10:06:00.000-04:00

well it's a monday bloody morning... and i have to go to work!!! oh fuck me.. really its messed up i hate my job, and i have to go.. cuz i have debts to pay and another reason is that i havent start my way towards my career.. but i will and i'll be glad!!

FOOD(**ICK**)

anyway haven't eaten since friday and it feels good to be empty!!.. well i dont wanna go back to i.p for sure.. that's a scary ass place. that why ill just loose for now like another 5-10 ponds.. (that would make me around 90.. not bad.. man i'm never staisfied.. sometmes i think i'm cursed)and cool it so my mom doesn't freak out and then when i go off to university i can do what the hell i want!! i mean seriously they just don't understand.. u know that fear u get when u watch a really scary movie or when u have walk down a dark alley by yourself.. thats how i feel about food and eating it and all that yuck in my body .. it's just not rite... i'm not asking for much i just want it off!! just oof and never come back(it= fat) i'm sorry i wont make this post about my e.d. i have another blog for that. where i get more in depth.

WEEKEND ACTION

Well my week end started off pretty lame.. and upseting.. had nothing to do on a friggin friday night!! equals lame.. i didnt feel like going anywhere anyway..lol

had some issues with my ex- g/f i mean nothing dramatic but it still was a bit upseting.. not even getting into it

then saturday i was just chillin went to a friends house. i met some people ofcourse ...ok i admit it! i met some women

lol..yea pretty nice had a few drinks chat a bit u know just ultimate chilling and just have a nice time

however, lets just say that some ppl wanted more than a 'nice' time..hehe

well 2 infact with me. i felt strange at time.. this one chick D kept saying i have a beuatiful body and she wants to eat me up like a hershey's chocolate.. lol i know. we danced alot together

it was awesome dancing with D i was grinding on her and she was grinding on me..(kinda like sex on the dance floor thing.. )

fucking loved it!

love a nice butt!

so sunday rolls around and i went with my friend to the one of the same chicks house
we played taboo!!! my fav! haha...anyway we like playing and others playing dominoes and cards

say a bout 12-15 ppl there..

some how i just dont know how really(**lying**) lol

i ended up upstairs..it was really hot tho.. i went upstais with one of the chicks lets call her S.

yea we were kissing for a long time and touching and it was just steamy

loved it!

and like omg she slapped my ass! lol i like it ..

so we are getting it on and like in 2 secs we are butt naked and all upon each other

then her friend walks in! D..lol

at this point im too involve and heated to even question it ..lol

i was like oh fuck it! get over here sweetie...

all in all we were in the bed.. on the balcony(its high up lol)

in bathroom.. in the shower on the roof.. just all over the place..

really good!

i think we came back with everyone like around 9pm lol

i know! i left the game at 2pm

mm well 2-9pm is minor.. to me.. i should have been staying the whole night..

but i have work in the morn!!(**pissed**) lol

but yea all in all it was hot fun!

SCHOOL
I HAVE TO STUDY. S.A.TS COMING UP FAST..

JUST PRACTICING THE MATHS ECTION.. I MEAN I'M NOT WORRIED AND THAT'S A GOOD SIGN..

BUT I HAVE TO KICK THIS EXAM'S ASS..LOL

YEA THE HIGHEST IS 2400.. SO THATS MY AIM!!

LOVE YALL AND ALL WHO READ JUST COMMEN ME I MAN ITS ONLY THE RITE THING AND WELL MANNERED THING TO DO... LOL

**SMOCCHES**

SAME COURSE NEW ACTIONS

2007-09-21T11:44:00.000-04:00

hey guys oh wow some actually read this blog...thanks!

FOOD&WEIGHT

well i'm on the same couse which is to loose duh!

but i got my dextrime yesterday..

Has anyone ever used it?

Does it work?

well i 'm going to aerobic twice and week and and eating very lightly.

don't feel too bad about eating,

since i have to eat something to take the dextrime u know.

well i hope that i loose some off my fat ass by next week...

this is depressing

SEX

well the i've been seeing this girl for like a year now. the sex is amazing and i love her

but i guess all good things come to an end soon.

yea she left for university august... f*kingsucks!

mm but we had a mutual agreement when she left

if we are suppose to meet again or be together we will.

but shes her own woman and so am i. i met this girl. her names S.G.

yea she pretty cool.. we fool arond alot

but i dont wanna fuck her..mm she doesn't seem that interesting in bed

im sorry!! but its true... but shes a beautiful person tho.. thats

why shes my friend.

i went over to S.S house and we had crazy sex!!! lol

from 9am to 4pm.. mm not bad

but i wanted more.. i know

i hear it from her all the time NYMPO!!

but she is too so it work out great.

she has the nicest pussy ever i could be there all day.

it was just intense..

there something about women

i know im such a dyke!!! LOL

but yea women i just love making them smile, happy and feel good

and ofcourse making the cum and moan... i love that!

just a woman's moan alone can turn me so on!!

I LOVE PLEASING WOMEN

THEY ARE THE BEST THING ON EARTH!!

(not saying cuz i'm a girl..but even if i was a guy i would say that too.. but im glad i'm a girl lol)

next entry will be about our little sexcapade that i had with S.S

DANCE

dancing going on well not doing ballet as much anymore

just other tye of dance u know.

love hip-hop and contemporary now

cheerleading is ok too. kindof off season now u know

training not as often

SCHOOL

hopefully if there everything work out

i will e off to pursue my dream of

RADIOLOGY!!!

issues

2007-08-13T20:56:00.000-04:00

today is the begining of a new week i love new weeks by the way. it gives me a fresh start to most of my happenings.

my girlfriend leaves on wednesday for university in canada. thats so sucks i know but we can visit each other but its tsill makes me sad. mm what to do? should i stay in it and hope it works out? should i ? well i love her to death and thats that so i guess im gonna.

dancing and all my activities are on a break. i feel so restless. i cant take it i love being active. i mean how else to doi get to burn calories.

N.B I AM ABOUT TO DISCUSS SOME PERSONAL MATTERS THAT HAVE AFFECT MY LIFE SO IF YOU DONT LIKE IT OR U THINK ITS STUID OR YOU ARE AGAINST IT PLEASE DONT BASH ME..IF SO KEEP UR NASTY COMMENTS TO YOURSELF! ITS MY LIFE AND THIS IS WHATS HAPPENING IN IT NOW

well as for my eating disorder issue yea my mom really clamp down on me but she isnt as worried as b4 becuse of what i weigh(by the weigh a truck load).
heres the thing in january i weighed in at 98lbs mm yea im 5ft 2inches so because of my not so good history with food my mom freaked.. and went to rehab(the story of my life blah) yea i have been out 4 months now and im said to be at a 'good weight'... whatever.
STATS.(lw-lowest weight, cw-current, gw-goal w, ugw-ultimate goal...)
lw-80lbs (scary even for me....but u know thats how it goes)
cw-118lbs(not happy at all)
ugw-100(i think thats what i can deal with without feeling like crap everyday...then will i be statisfied?)
gw1-116lbs
gw2-114lbs etc

yea im on a diet i mean seriously i told my mom how i feel. im just not comfortable at this weight.. that leads me to ask what ai ever gonna be comfortable with? yep the cycle continues. everyone is like come on hun u are tiny.. and why i cant i damn well see it!

my intake today

one veggie salad and a glass a water .... im done for the day!
i even feel bad and guilty when i had that salad. i know its hard for anyone reading this to even understand why in the first place but i dont know either. i hate it wen im full i hate it wen im satisfied and i just hate it... yea seriously only time i feel good or atleast not like shit is when im hungry or empty... thats just how it is.

i'm going to the movies with one of m friends.. but i get this weird notion that she likes me or something... its weird i mean im not even think of hooking up much less another relationship... but shekeeps call our outing a date...??? should i be alarmed?? lol i dunno i guess i'll see

well as for excercise. wanna go to the gym but its so bloody far from me. mm wow i wish i live in the area that my g/f lives where there are tracks where u can run cuz its all private.. i would run everyday for eternity. i will maybe just do some lit excercise in my room.(not satisfied but hey better than ntn)